Jhon Duran is the Colombian Balotelli after his most mercenary move yet | OneFootball

It was September 2024 and the international break had been dominated by Barclaysman discourse and the absence of long-range thunderstrikes. Jhon Duran took that personally.

With Aston Villa level at 2-2 with winless Everton, Duran picked up possession approximately three miles from goal.

No danger. Jordan Pickford could afford to pick up his vape or scroll through Instagram.

Within seconds, Villa Park had descended into pandemonium. The young Colombian had unleashed a heat-seeking missile straight into the top corner. It’s possible some Villa fans let out a little wee in all the excitement.

“We don’t see goals like that anymore,” Jamie Carragher said on commentary. “The bend on that was fantastic – the goalkeeper was at full stretch.”

Emiliano Martinez was equally as effusive: “I have seen it from behind and I saw the ball moving – it was unstoppable.”

A few weeks later, Duran scored the winner against Bayern Munich in a raucous Champions League match. This was a player clearly going places.

“He can be one of the best strikers in the world, but he needs to keep his feet on the ground and to work hard,” Martinez added.

And that’s the rub. Since leaving the Premier League last January in a £64million deal, Duran has been on a whistlestop tour of retirement leagues and supersize contracts.

The striker lasted six months in the Saudi Pro League, where Cristiano Ronaldo apparently took a dislike to him, before swapping Al-Nassr for Fenerbahce in a season-long loan.

His time in Turkey has been tempestuous. Duran’s quality has flickered at times, but has been overshadowed by some listless displays and bouts of immaturity.

It’s an eternal regret that the inner monologue of Jose Mourinho was unavailable during the short time the two worked together at Fenerbahce.

The player and his agent have spent the January window casting their net far and wide for another move.

Several Premier League clubs were linked, attracted to his talent but deterred by the seemingly endless baggage.

It now appears he’s off to Russia and Zenit St Petersburg. This is clearly not a man kept awake at night by geopolitics.

Zenit are far from the team that won the 2008 UEFA Cup, even if they’re one point behind leaders Krasnodar in the Russian Premier League.

But it’s startling to observe Duran’s career from afar. He’s still just 22 and was recently regarded as one of the world’s finest young strikers. His worst choice appears to always be the next one.

Seemingly precocious and impetuous in equal measure, the Colombian was apparently banned from the national side’s training camp last year for arrogance and poor behaviour.

What’s certain is that Duran’s entourage is either equally immature or doesn’t have his best interests at heart.

To have played in the MLS, Saudi Pro League, Turkey and Russia by the age of 22 is something else. The Oxford English Dictionary might have to redefine the word ‘mercenary’.

It’s not too late. A player with Duran’s raw ability will always find work, especially if he loses his inclination to burn bridges.

But fulfilling his potential is becoming an increasingly unlikely prospect, as is the chance of seeing his thunderb*stards back in the Premier League.

The universe is merely a collection of atomic particles in endless, aimless collision. It’s also a pretty good description of Duran’s career.