Santa Gets Ripped, But Kids Shine At Brisbane Celtic Party

In partnership with

The Celtic Star

·2 December 2024

Santa Gets Ripped, But Kids Shine At Brisbane Celtic Party

Santa Gets Ripped, But Kids Shine At Brisbane Celtic Party…

Brisbane Celtic Christmas Party. Photo Brisbane CSC

It was meant to be the season of goodwill at the Brisbane Celtic Supporters Club as unsuspecting families rocked up to meet Santa at the annual Christmas party. But Streuth, the rotund rebel left them in stitches, along with his festive attire!

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Back in the Baywatch days

Mums and dads, brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles; they were all left blushing as the Joy Bringer (or, toy bringer) fluffed his lines. I’m not sure who was the man behind the shonky beard, the ill-fitting tunic, nor the shorts which Pamela Anderson may have flaunted back in the Baywatch days.

However, I’d suggest he ought to have gone to Myer Stores for his get-up, rather than The Dollar Shop. Shame on him!

“Ho-Ho-Ho”ed his way into the arena

The Lord Alfred was bustling, and bristling with excitement as the little ones (no sign of Kyogo though) cavorted on the dance floor with their balloons and brightened the mood with their lovely wee Celtic outfits. They were a pleasure. On cue, the Christmas music was turned up, and the Murarrie Santa (or so I hear) “Ho-Ho-Ho”ed his way into the arena.

Brisbane Celtic Christmas Party. Photo Brisbane CSC

There was loud cheering and clapping among the faithful as the strangest Santa in history (according to his wife, allegedly named Ursula!) bumbled his way across the floor. His bulbous sack almost brought the poor chap down, but, there was something else hindering the sub-tropical buffoon.

Was he holding up his breeks? Couldn’t be! With that belly, nothing could possibly escape. Should the gawping audience have cared to cast unenviable glances towards his nether regions, they might have sighted a broken belt, and, a ripped bahooky!

Surely not! Some eagle-eyed parents might have suspected that this North Polemic party-crasher was a fraud! However, the consummate professional plonked himself down on a well-placed seat, and the party was well and truly underway.

Akin to Captain Hook in the movie

“Ho Ho Ho! Welcome children,” he bellowed in a voice more akin to Captain Hook in the movie of the same name!

I’d probably be liable for damages if I revealed the content of the conversations with the giggling gift-getters, but it may, or may not have been along the lines of, ‘I know who you are, EDDIE!’ Of course, the fits of giggles between us and their parents will remain a thing of conjecture; probably didn’t happen.

So, when the sweat beads of laughter were wiped away and the gifts were distributed, Santa made his cautious way out. As he did, he spotted a befuddled looking chap making his way to the bar. “Have you been a good boy for Mummy and Daddy this year, young man?” Santa’s black eye this year may, or may not be a result of that jovial interaction…

Brisbane Celtic Christmas Party. Photo Brisbane CSC

But look, was he holding onto his now semi-destroyed shorts? Only he could confirm this. When he had made his bow-legged way to the upstairs dressing room), it would be, wouldn’t it!) the after party was sensational as the now-transformed debutant was ribbed (not ripped!) mercilessly.

Did he get ripped at the bar? That’s none of your business!

Celtic gave us a five-star performance

Blushes aside, Santa would like to thank all who participated in this Christmas Spectacular, particularly Mark Duffy who organised the event, and held the camera manfully, despite his shaking shoulders Thanks to the staff of the L.A. who were, as always, cheery, accommodating, and thoughtful. We owe them a debt of gratitude.

Celtic gave us a five-star performance later that evening. It’s good to know that they turned up, even if the real Santa didn’t!

Ho Ho Ho chums!

Hail Hail!

Eddie Murray

Celtic Star Books – Buy Two Get One Free Offer!

A nice wee offer which runs from now until midnight on Wednesday 4th December. Order any two books from celticstarbooks.com then select a third book FREE OF CHARGE. Just put the two you are buying into the shopping cart and then in the notes section just mention the third book that you’d like. And if you want us to send that book to a different address, perhaps as a Christmas gift, in the UK then we’ll happily do that too!

Choose from the books shown below, although we are out of stock on The Celtic Rising and also Walfrid & The Bould Bhoys but the rest are available.