🎄 Smaller boots & 10 clones: a Christmas gift for every Bundesliga team | OneFootball

15 matchdays are over, the Bundesliga is on break, and somewhere between mulled wine, gingerbread, and Advent singing, the question arises: What actually belongs under the Christmas tree of our German top clubs?

Not everything can be given as a gift, but one can always wish. So let’s hand out presents, sometimes realistic, sometimes delightfully unrealistic: transfers, runs of form, sturdy knees.

Of course, all of this is done with a wink, because anyone who doesn’t take football with a sense of humor probably also believes in a World Cup title for Curaçao.

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A Christmas Gift for Every Bundesliga Club

FC Bayern: As league leaders and record champions, Bayern will be wishing for one thing above all as they look ahead to a long second half of the season—something that often sounds a bit banal in everyday life: lots and lots of health! Because this thin squad simply can’t afford injuries—especially when you consider Kompany’s intense style and Munich’s lofty ambitions.

RB Leipzig: We all know that one uninspired child who wishes for nothing but money. In Bundesliga terms, that child is RB Leipzig. And given the potential €100 million sale of Yan Diomande, this wish is anything but unrealistic.

Borussia Dortmund: Few clubs have such a clear Christmas wish as BVB. Under the black-and-yellow Christmas tree, everyone is desperately hoping for a contract extension for Nico Schlotterbeck.

Bayer Leverkusen: Against Cologne, Martin Terrier scored probably the most beautiful goal of the Bundesliga season so far. Maybe the Werkself will bring along a TV that simply shows this goal on an endless loop.

TSG Hoffenheim: Despite good performances, regularly playing in front of a foreign crowd even at home? That sounds anything but ideal—and from TSG’s perspective, it’s something that can gladly change in 2026.

VfB Stuttgart: Things are going well on the pitch for the neighbors in Stuttgart too. However, the Swabians have an offside problem, being caught in the forbidden zone 2.5 times per game. Will kit supplier Jako put some smaller football boots under the tree on Christmas Eve?

Eintracht Frankfurt: Frankfurt’s biggest Christmas wish is also a clearly formulated assignment for sporting director Markus Krösche. With Burkardt injury-prone, Batshuayi injured, and Wahi as toothless as the baby Jesus, SGE urgently needs a new striker this winter.

Union Berlin: Regular goals from strikers would also suit the Iron Ones. But even more important to coach Steffen Baumgart is probably that “his” viral meme finally dies out in 2026—you know, the video of a man who looks suspiciously like the coach dancing on Hamburg’s Reeperbahn. In the clip, the Baumgart lookalike seems to be having just a bit too much fun. 

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SC Freiburg: No other Bundesliga team is lagging behind its expected points as much as SC Freiburg. So the Breisgau club would be happy with a bit more luck. They’re also still waiting for the real breakthrough of €7 million signing Igor Matanovic.

FC Köln: Much like a seven-year-old dreams of their own helicopter, Effzeh dreams of keeping Said El Malas beyond the current season. Since that won’t happen, Cologne would also settle for a worry-free second half of the season.

Borussia Mönchengladbach: Just 60km away on the Lower Rhine, people are wishing that coach Eugen Polanski will appear as stylish at press conferences as he does on the touchline. 

Werder Bremen: Whether it’s through a breakthrough from Keke Topp or a sudden explosion in form from Victor Boniface—Werder desperately needs reliable output from its strikers in the second half of the season!

VfL Wolfsburg: Here, Dženan Pejčinović probably has only one wish on his list: that his next hat-trick will finally be enough for three points. Or at least for one.

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Hamburger SV: On their mission to stay up, HSV needs one thing above all: more confidence away from home! While the promoted side is a top team at home, they’re dead last in the away table.

FC Augsburg: In Augsburg, it’s not so much about what’s under the tree this year. Much more important is what comes after the tree.

FC St. Pauli: The run of nine straight defeats means that fans on the Kiez now celebrate their own points more than free drinks at the nightclub. That can gladly continue in January!

FC Heidenheim: If you could clone last-minute monster Stefan Schimmer ten times, FCH would probably be fighting for the Champions League instead of against relegation. Will this technological advance be possible by Christmas? As they say along the Brenz, hope dies last.

FSV Mainz 05: The uncle who always wishes for the good old days—we all know him! At Mainz 05, those days were only six months ago. Still, the Rheinhessen would do anything to relive them once more.

This article was translated into English by Artificial Intelligence. You can read the original version in 🇩🇪 here.

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