Tottenham lose their balance, the ball and all remaining dignity in abject defeat to Atletico | OneFootball

If nothing else, Tottenham Hotspur succeeded in putting the mad into Madrid. And yet there may be a sliver of a chance the craziest bit is still to come. In the meltdown in the Metropolitano, Spurs appeared to knock themselves out of the Champions League in 22 strange, shocking minutes. An hour later, Dominic Solanke’s goal might have offered a lifeline to a team seemingly with a death wish. A triumphant comeback next week went from impossible to merely improbable.

Because Tottenham could be grateful they leave Spain only beaten 5-2. They seemed to turn up in the wrong boots, with the wrong goalkeeper and the wrong manager. They gifted Atletico Madrid an assortment of ridiculous goals, the first three each sillier than the last, the fifth with a hole where their defence was supposed to be. A team with a capacity for slip-ups took it literally, losing their balance, the ball, their dignity and, probably, their place in the Champions League. Their manager may lose his job.

This was a harrowing night for the hapless Antonin Kinsky, a horrible one for the hopeless Igor Tudor. The biggest selection decision of his brief reign will surely be destined to be remembered as the worst. By the time Atletico went 4-0 up in the 22nd minute, Kinsky had already gone, his unexpected appearance so painful he met with sympathetic applause from the home fans.

Because this was Spurs’ most shambolic start to a game since they went 5-0 down to Newcastle in 21 minutes three years ago. That was Cristian Stellini’s last game in charge. Another interim could face a similar fate. This particular Tudor, like two of the wives of a historical namesake, may be bound for the chop.

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Antonin Kinsky had a night to forget in the Spanish capital (PA Wire)

The Premier League should dictate his fate but the Europa League winners, the side who finished fourth in the Champions League group stage, began by embarrassing themselves on the continental stage.

A side with five clean sheets in their previous six Champions League games were four down a quarter of the way into this. Sadly for the reserve goalkeeper, his display is destined for infamy; like Loris Karius after the 2018 Champions League final, he may take a long time to recover.

Kinsky’s calamitous cameo was over within 17 minutes. Injuries apart, has a goalkeeper has ever been substituted sooner? Yet the essential fault lay with Tudor. He dropped Guglielmo Vicario for his deputy, who had not played since October, and soon had to swap them back. Kinsky felt like collateral damage for managerial ineptitude. The decision to remove him may have been necessary, but it was heartless. The decision to pick him was clueless.

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Antonin Kinsky was comforted by his Tottenham team-mates as he was substituted (PA Wire)

Tudor was brutal. The compassion came instead from Cristian Romero, Kevin Danso and Pedro Porro, who commiserated with the goalkeeper on his way off the pitch, and, after Tudor ignored him, substitutes Dominic Solanke, Conor Gallagher and Joao Palhinha, who followed Kinsky into the dressing room to console him. Tudor could argue that sacrificing Kinsky preserved Spurs’ chances: Vicario, who made a fine save from Ademola Lookman, coped admirably in the circumstances.

But Kinsky’s 13th Tottenham appearance was unlucky for him and them. He fell over while attempting to pass the ball out, skewing it instead to Lookman. He fed Julian Alvarez who found Marcos Llorente to sidefoot in the sixth-minute opener.

Then it was Micky van de Ven’s turn. Fresh from his red card against Crystal Palace, the Dutchman made another awful error. Rather than meeting Pape Matar Sarr’s pass, Van de Ven fell over, allowing Antoine Griezmann to stroll through and score.

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Julian Alvarez scored twice as Atletico ran rampant (Getty)

The third was still more ridiculous. Van de Ven was the next to pass back, ill-advisedly, as Kinsky scuffed his touch straight to Alvarez. Kinsky had his head on the ground in disappointment even before the striker had walked the ball into the net.

After he departed, Vicario conceded after five minutes, albeit following a brilliant save to spare Sarr an own goal. Robin Le Normand forced in the rebound before Vicario, by now behind his line, could claw it out.

Spurs’ fifth was a second for Alvarez, justifying Diego Simeone’s decision to pick him ahead of Alexander Sorloth. Seconds after Jan Oblak made a brilliant save from Richarlison’s header, the magnificent Griezmann released Alvarez with a majestic touch. The Argentinian ran from inside his own half, into a gap, with Porro in distant pursuit to angle a shot beyond Vicario.

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Atletico raced to a 4-1 lead inside half an hour before Alvarez added a fifth in the second time (AFP via Getty Images)

And yet Atleti should end with regrets. They were insufficiently ruthless. As Spurs showed verve in attack, they were far less watertight at the back than the Simeone sides of old. Porro squeezed in a low shot to reduce the deficit. Romero headed against the outside of the post.

And as the blunders became contagious, after Oblak’s poor pass, Solanke fired a shot into the roof of the net. After the ignominy and the idiocy, the sequel will start with Spurs only three goals behind.