Clarke Carlisle: Football ace reveals alcoholism battle that lead to suicide bid | OneFootball

Clarke Carlisle, the former QPR, Leeds and Burnley defender, 46, has described becoming suicidal amid alcoholism and gambling, revealing two attempts on his life across 13 years.

“If I played well then I was a good human and I was allowed to smile, and I could go home and be nice to my family. If I played poorly, I was a bad human,” he told Abbeycare’s Listen Up podcast.

He recalled a 2001 knee injury and heavy daily drinking, saying, “I sat on a futon and drank myself into oblivion. I placed that order probably six days a week for a five-week period.” Around then he attempted to take his own life, later returning to play for 12 more years.

After retiring in 2013 he endured “the longest and deepest depressive episode of my life”. In 2014 he made another attempt, spending six weeks in hospital after being hit by a lorry. He said he felt “without football I was no-one” and “an abject failure without football”.

Treatment at Blackburn Psychiatric Hospital, including cognitive analytic therapy, helped him regain control. He urged others to seek professional help, saying: “There are literally thousands of people who are qualified and trained to be invested in your wellness. Go there first.”

Carlisle has recently taken up a role as business development executive at Betknowmore, a charity supporting gambling addicts.

Source: yorkshireeveningpost.co.uk