Indecent exposure | OneFootball

This is the story of two North Shields blokes, both called John, who are now sadly departed.

They were canny fellas in their own definable way but both harboured a dark secret.

I began drinking in the Terminus Club in Shields in the early to mid 1990s. This was an excitable time, especially for a young Toon fan in his 20s like me.

The old club steward was a wiry looking man called John, who would seemingly tolerate no nonsense. He especially used to get himself upset when the lads in the club would jovially wax lyrical about King Kev’s Entertainers.

Whenever questioned about why he never showed the same enthusiasm for the Toon as what we did, he would tell us that he had always supported Chelsea, having been stationed down there whilst in the army.

This didn’t stop me noticing that when Newcastle United got pipped for the title in 1996, then lost the 1998 and 99 FA Cup Finals, John seemed to take a great deal of satisfaction.

As the years rolled by I didn’t get in the Terminus as often and my local became The Albert on Tynemouth Road. I popped in there on a May night in 2004, and my mate Alfie who is originally from Wearside was in with his Sunderland top on.

The mackems were playing Crystal Palace in the second leg of their Championship play-off semi final at the Stadium of Light. He was sitting next to John, who explained that he had a night off from the Terminus.

During the game John was getting more wound up than the much calmer Alfie, seemed to be kicking every ball. Needless to say the evening ended in another glorious play off failure for the red and whites, who lost after a penalty shoot-out.

I always celebrate these occasions wildly. Alfie has never allowed his allegiance to Sunderland spoil his social time, and is well used to all of the micky taking and hardly batted an eyelid as Jason McAteer sobbed on the pitch.

John however could not hide his emotions and told me I was an a…hole. I responded by telling him that he had hid behind a Chelsea charade for years when it looked like Newcastle were going to be winning trophies. He then readily admitted that he absolutely despised Newcastle United and his loyalties had always been towards the mackems.

Despite this, as John got older we became a lot closer, and I saw a much more friendly and lighthearted side of him.

‘John 2’ had been a bit of a hardcase in his day, had worked the doors in Shields and the Coast in the 1960s and 70s.

He used to sometimes join in our company when Newcastle United were having a second renaissance under Sir Bobby Robson. Apparently John was a Manchester United fan.

I quite liked John but one night the s… definitely hit the fan. I was drinking with one of the old Bender Squad Alan McBlain, in Charlie Robson’s in the centre of North Shields. The Toon were playing on the box.

‘John 2’ joined us in a round and didn’t seem particularly enamoured with another wonderful Newcastle performance. Of course these were the days when we were on a fantastic Champions League adventure.

I asked John if he felt a little bit left out with him being a supporter of the false United. He went on the defensive but I pushed it because something didn’t quite add up.

His knowledge of the likes of Edwards, Charlton, Law and Best wasn’t as good as mine for instance, even though I was much younger.

I asked if he was using Man U as a cover because he was a closet mackem. He seemed to be getting edgy and Maccas told me to give him a break which I did.

However, after about 10 minutes of cordiality, an obviously still rattled John then made a derogatory remark about Newcastle United. It was then that I said that I reckoned he was definitely a mackem.

He denied it two or three times, but as I kept pressing, his resolve was wearing. Like something reminiscent of the courtroom scene in ‘A Few Good Men’, John did the best ever Jack Nicholson /Colonel Jessop impersonation.

He more or less angrily blurted straight out “You’re god damn right I’m a mackem. I hate all you black and white barstewards.” Game set and match for me the prosecutor, as McBlain would later regale the tale.

‘John 2’ finally was exposed but at least he was free of his embarrassing secret. I got on well with him thereafter and he didn’t seem to harbour any resentment to me.

What always gets me though is why these two good men just didn’t admit to supporting Sunderland in the first place.